There comes a point in your life when you get used to people fucking ditching you. But it still hurts. You get the sympathy text 10 minutes before an event “sorry, (insert excuse here), but maybe next time!” But next time never really comes. And if it magically fucking does, you can tell they’re just not that thrilled, or it doesn’t go as planned.
You get your stupid fucking hopes up, just to have your dreams crushed. Then you end up sobbing into your oversized glass of wine sitting in cold bath water because you’re too bummed to get out when it starts to get lukewarm. It happens all too often.
By now you’d think I’d stop trying. Maybe the people that I think are my friends just aren’t that into me. Maybe they don’t think I’m as funny as I think I am. I think I’m pretty damn funny. My fiancé thinks I am, well atleast he tells me I am.
They should give a course at the local community college “how to make friends for the socially awkward” I’d take that class!
Maybe I’ll just stop trying. If I seem like I don’t care, maybe those friends will try harder to make plans with me.
Do I seem desperate for companionship, maybe. But damnit I’m a human too. I’ve got feelings too!